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Mass hypnosis! Hand of doom!
Global slavery! No tune!

Mass Hypnosis! Grand Illusion!
Global Slavery! Diffusion!

        \/\/\/

Social networks, all around,
on the streets, a muted crowd

Too much sex, we talk around,
but the kiss so hard to found

Beauty contests for the dogs!
Souls unborn, Our babies lost!

Plastic surgeries for grands!
Children raped by their dads!

Take your pill, It's what you need,
Take your pill and you will sleep.

Now get in! Into your cage!
And don't try to turn the page!

You can't live as you will,
a whistling up and stay still

There is nothing to decide,
It is only their side

Stop to talk! Don't even feel!
Did you pay every bill?

They're everywhere, They hear!
They're far, but so near!

        \/\/\/

Mass hypnosis! Hand of doom!
Global slavery! No tune!

Mass Hypnosis! Grand Illusion!
Global Slavery! Diffusion!
Αντίστοιχο Στα Ελληνικά:

21_El


Κάτι Σχετκό Στα Ελληνικά:

TO KLOUVI

Add a Comment:
 
:iconrazor440:
Razor440 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2015
Twany-Wahn!
Reply
:iconmetalclawwarrior:
Metalclawwarrior Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2014
This world
Its insane
Pain
refuses to go away
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Unfortunately.
Reply
:iconfirebreather2536:
firebreather2536 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I want to sing this so bad.
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
What kind of music?
Reply
:iconfirebreather2536:
firebreather2536 Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
punk rock. :3
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Punk-rock is fine!
From time to time I'm inspired from music-songs. 21 "belongs" to the old SEPULTURA or today's CAVALERA CONSPIRARY. I've even imagined Max starting a live show with the intro of 21.
Reply
:iconirishgirl217:
irishgirl217 Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2014
Amazing. It's how the world's headed, and I'm glad someone else sees it.
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks.
Reply
:iconirishgirl217:
irishgirl217 Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2014
no problem!
Reply
:iconjohnnythesailor:
JohnnyTheSailor Featured By Owner May 2, 2014
Δυναμίτης!!!
:clap:
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner May 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Ευχαριστώ.
Reply
:iconerikthewild:
ErikTheWild Featured By Owner May 2, 2014
:clap:
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner May 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks!
Reply
:iconjimmyroger:
JimmyRoger Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014
Δυβατό!!!
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Ευχαριστώ.
Reply
:iconoliviathehealer:
OliviaTheHealer Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014
Πλαστική για τη γιαγιά
και βιάστε τα παιδιά!!!            
Reply
:iconoliviathehealer:
OliviaTheHealer Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconlimarieinred:
limarieinred Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Moving and sad!  Well written!
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks.
Reply
:iconeyirokafou:
EyiRokafou Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2014
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Ευχαριστώ.
Reply
:iconeyirokafou:
EyiRokafou Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2014
Παρακαλώ
Reply
:iconmadhat11d6:
MadHat11D6 Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2013   Writer
Hello there.

To be perfectly honest, I don't like reading this style of poetry (more on that later). But, objectively speaking, you've done a good job with the style and getting across your point. Talking about our over sexualized  rape society and how we're trapping ourselves by valuing beauty over other things without it turning into a very specific rant. I see what you're saying, but I think you could go one step further. 

Before I actually talk about there, there are a couple of small things about wording. The repetition of 'Mass hypnosis' and 'global slavery' is a bit awkward (not from beginning to end so much as in the two stanzas). Okay, this is slightly about going one step further, too. I think in the second stanza of those first and last chucked you should change your opening exclamations. We know about mass hypnosis and global slavery. Tell us more. 

I really like the third stanza. The flow of the fourth stanza is not quite resolved. Which is not working, in this case. Maybe instead of 'so hard to found' you could try 'so hard, not found'. Or something of the sort. The awkward working seems entirely for the sake of the rhyme. If the poem was filled with the same type of awkward wordings, it would feel purposeful and broken. More on that later.

There's nothing exactly wrong about 'beauty contests for the dogs' but you might get across a distaste if you said 'beauty contests, to the dogs!' but either works. By 'plastic surgery for grands', you you mean for a lot of money, or for rich people? Both? I like that line after reading it a few times. It took me a second. 'Children raped by their dads' feels a bit forced. Children are being raped, but in the direction you've taken the poem thus far it would be beneficial to get across the disgust of how society cares more about beauty than children being raped. Or something of the sort. I really like the stanza after that. 

'And don't try to turn the page' flows awkwardly. I think you can add another syllable here. Like 'do not try' or 'don't you try' or something like that. There is a similar weirdness in the next stanza. There aren't commas, so the flow wants to give each of those lines another syllable somewhere. 'It is only their side' also seems to be lacking a syllable.  

Okay. Going further. A couple of the things I said above connect to going further. But I have have some thoughts on the matter that you might want to consider. Glorifying beauty above all else and putting it in the spotlight to mask the horror is a possible sign of societal collapse. Anthropologically speaking. Like, plastic surgery was combined with pedophilia. And this can prove to be a very smart decision for the sake of this poem. Because the throw their money into plastic surgery instead of helping children in need because that's just where society has places it's value. This poem seems to be very much a 'face' poem. The kind that only has meaning if the reader gives it meaning. And that's fine. But a lot of people won't get what you're saying, and I think it's important to push the idea just a bit more. Also, this piece seems less like something someone should read, and more like something a group of people should read aloud, randomly shouting out lines and phrases in a deadpan. That would be way more impactful. hence, why I don't like reading this style. You miss a lot just reading it. 

That is all. (Belated critique from #PowerfulWriting 
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Oct 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You are the reader and probably you may be right, maybe you are not, but thanks for your time and words anyway.

* When it came the to upload this as it's really old to me I couldn't decide if I should put it under "songs and lyrics" or "traditional fixed forms". Finally it was "traditional fixed forms" and this brought me "troubles". I think that if it was under "songs and lyrics" things would be different.
Reply
:iconmadhat11d6:
MadHat11D6 Featured By Owner Oct 20, 2013   Writer
You're welcome. Yeah, that might make a difference as to how the piece is perceived. 
Reply
:iconpaninthedada:
paninthedada Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2013  Professional General Artist
If 21 stands for the twenty-first century, then this is absolutely genius. The 21st century summarized in a poem. *shrugs*
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks.
Reply
:iconhumanscolopendra:
HumanScolopendra Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I can't really see the issues brought by the poem relating to each other and you develop none of them, so it comes off for me as just another big rant about everything and nothing. What's the point?
Also, in the stanza about pedophilia rhyming is far from perfection (I don't see anything bad in plastic surgeries when taken by adults and combining them with something as serious as pedophilia appears kinda tactless for me, I know it's supposed to be a contrast saying how we put our attention to minor things while such terrible things are going on on the world, but still...but that's just my personal feels that are irrelevant to the poem's value, I guess)
Each century has it's positive and negative features, I guess.
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
If the contrast of the sexy society is tactless for you well maybe in this point we disagree.
In general plastic surgeries are not sth bad, but it's like THE KNIFE, though other people don't get hurt.
Furthermore, Yes, each time has positive and negatives, but each of us we own to fight the negatives, and don't forget that this is poetry-art, even if you don't find it successfull. If you find it successfull as, I mean well-written then again don't forget that this is poetry-art.
I hope I helped you, like you helped me too and I don't mean directly of course.

Really thank you!!!



  THE KNIFE


 Hold your knife, use it good,
 Don't be driven by your mood

 Look the tree and watch the forest,
 Watch the Red, she's going whorest!

 Now hold your pen, use also good,
 You can be a little rude

 Look the tree and watch the forest,
 Kill the Red! She's going whorest!!

"what's the pen and what's the knife?
 Is this monster our life?

 That's the pen, it's my knife,
 Is this monster my life?"

 You can use it, cut your bread
 or just grab it, kill your friend!

 You may feel a little hungry,
 but I'm here staring angry!

 It's just poetry damnation,
 It is just exaggeration!

 It is nothing, It's a hole!!
 It is everything! It's all!!!
Reply
:iconrosalinda16:
Rosalinda16 Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Amen to that.
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks!
Reply
:iconpoeknowsprose:
poeknowsprose Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2013
I absolutely loved this. Great subject and flow. Well done. 
Reply
:iconskeletonsbasements:
SkeletonsBasements Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
So good, written.
Reply
:iconroasted-torkoals:
Roasted-Torkoals Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2013
you chose 21


because you can drink beer at that age right

but this poem is awesome no less
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
21 stands for 2 things:

* Initially I couldn't find a nice title, not for this not for its greek version. But when I was trying to to make a compilation of my greek works, no matter if I was changing things, the twin greek version was always the 21st.
* I also had some other stuff that I thought that work as a description of the 21st century, with this beeing the most characteristic, so I made a folder in my gallery called 21.
Reply
:iconxxthebluejayxx:
xxthebluejayxx Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Dude. Dude. Amazing :+fav:

asdfghjkl why so amazing
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks!
Reply
:iconxxthebluejayxx:
xxthebluejayxx Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
No problem! :hug:
Reply
:iconjeffreyrebowlski:
JeffreyRebowlski Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I can imagine a man screaming this in the streets 
Reply
:iconirishgirl217:
irishgirl217 Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2013
I :heart: it!
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks!!
Reply
:icongoldennocturna:
GoldenNocturna Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Student Writer
Now, this...is one hell of a poem. It just screams about what's wrong with society (although, the part about unborn babies may be controversial/debatable by some), and I could just feel the energy behind it. Awesome job! :clap:
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Really thank you!
Reply
:icongoldennocturna:
GoldenNocturna Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2013  Student Writer
You're welcome!
Reply
:iconangeluchiha7:
angeluchiha7 Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2013  Student Artist
vary good poem again ^_^
Reply
:iconjaqerant92:
JaqErant92 Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Very powerful.
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks.
Reply
:iconqwibes:
qwibes Featured By Owner May 28, 2013   Writer
WOW!
Very strong, I like it! :)
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner May 28, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Glad you like it.
Reply
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